Why One Interview Is Not Enough to Choose a Host Family

The first video call felt perfect.

The parents were warm, the children waved at the camera, and every answer sounded reassuring. By the end of the conversation, saying yes seemed almost obvious. But one polished interview rarely shows what everyday life with a host family will truly feel like.

An au pair match influences where you live, how you work and whether you feel safe, respected and included. That decision deserves more than one carefully prepared conversation. Multiple video calls help au pairs understand the family’s communication style, childcare expectations and daily routines before accepting a match.

What a Second Interview Can Reveal

During the first call, everyone is usually on their best behaviour. The home is quiet, the questions are expected, and one parent may do most of the talking.

A second call often reveals more.

You may notice how the parents communicate with each other, how the children behave during an ordinary afternoon or whether both parents share the same expectations. Small details can show whether the family is organised, flexible, respectful—or simply presenting an ideal version of themselves.

Questions Every Au Pair Should Ask

Before choosing a host family, ask:

• How do you handle disagreements?

• What are the exact working hours and childcare duties?

• Which household tasks do you expect au pair to manage?

• How are schedule changes communicated?

• What happens when the children are sick?

• What are the kids' hobbies, and do you, as parents, have any daily or weekly engagements?

• Do you both work full-time, in a hybrid arrangement, or remotely?

• Where would the Au-pair room be located in the house?

These questions are not negative. They protect both the au pair and the host family from misunderstandings later.

Meet the Whole Family

Whenever possible, speak with both parents, spend time with the children and ask to contact a current or former au pair. Parents explain the schedule. Children reveal the atmosphere. A former au pair can describe what daily life feels like after the welcome period ends. A trustworthy host family will not pressure you to decide immediately. They will welcome further questions because careful matching benefits everyone.

Successful au pair matching begins with honest communication, NOT a perfect first impression. Before saying yes, schedule at least 6 calls.The right host family will still feel right when the prepared smiles fade and the real conversation begins.